be happy to tell you, “Yes. Yes, I do, sometimes.”
But, not all of the time. And, see… This is an improvement. I no longer dream of you every night. I have had to move past this stage in my life and since I am older, a little bit wiser, I have better things to do than
Dream About You.
Now that we are clear, let me tell you what is new.
- I no longer get nervous when I speak to people face to face. I can look a person dead in the eyes and formulate words with the slightest of ease. But, not a crowd. Just not a crowd.
I Am Not Ready For That Yet.
- I am sure of my words. I do not question them. Before I say them, I think about them; how they will be received and if it is necessary for me to use them. In other words, I am confident in myself and my stance on various things, but I am mindful of the feelings of others.
You Would Be Proud Of Me
Or Would You?
- I love myself more. I LOVE MYSELF MORE. I love myself more.
I thought you needed to see that three times, you know? Just for effect.
- I am interested in giving my complete self to someone who is willing to deal with the wall.
What wall? The very wall I decided to build. The one that keeps me safe. That brick and mortar settling securely over my heart. You know, THAT wall… I come tumbling down when the right hands are removing it. No extra work needed. Just time.
I wanna be what he wants when he wants it
And whenever he needs it
And when he’s lonesome and feelin’ loved starved
I’ll be there to feed it
Lovin’ him a little bit more each day
It turns me right on when I hear him say
- I have more to give than I did when we were US.
So much more to give. I will openly admit this. I was never truly open with you. I constantly had to press through a shield, pick a lock, tear at cardboard to get to YOU and since that was our life… I bubbled up, knowing that the core of me was too fragile to keep digging for the core of you.
We just weren’t ready. We thought we were.
We Were Wrong.
I love what you have done for me. I shed dead skin. It needed to take place. I do thank you for your services. They will forever be remembered, even when it is too painful to recollect. You gave me this woman. And, this woman is amazing on a bad day.
So, you see… I love you for what you have given me. I will tell anyone that. No bad bones. No animosity. Just raw truth. You respected that.
Do You Still Respect That?
Hey baby let’s get away
Let’s go somewhere far
Baby can we
I still dream of you, but only because I need the past to know I am better now.